National Lockdown: Day Five I’m happy to report that the past couple of days have actually gone pretty quickly. It turns out that being busy really is the best way to make the time pass. And sure, I haven’t done any exercise, I haven’t watched the latest season of Ozark, I’ve been limiting my phone …
National Lockdown: Day Four Congratulations everyone we’re on Day Four, we’re on 1280 confirmed cases, and South Africa has recently been downgraded to Junk. I now know how my parents must have felt when they received my Std 5 report card. But if we’re using my delinquency as a metaphor, ‘just look at me now’. …
National Lockdown: Day Three I woke up with a feeling of guilt, brought on by last night’s nutritious dinner of blue cheese and a slab of chocolate. This little piggy had every intention of dusting off her Rosemary Conley DVDs, because a brush with death before breakfast is how I like to roll. I figured, …
National Lockdown: Day Two Ron Moss and I have had another great day together. I’ve been chatting to him quite a lot despite the fact that he really is empty inside. But, I guess he does provide some company, and at this stage I’ll take all the company I can get. And, it seems that …
National Lockdown: Day One I stayed awake past midnight last night, not because I wanted to be awake for the momentus midnight curfew, but because I’m a night owl and I was really enjoying my episode of Money Heist. In any non-event, nothing happened at midnight. When I woke up this morning it was very …
In this age of uncertainty, it’s really nice to know that everyone is doing their bit to “flatten the curve”. I mean previously “flattening curves” meant busting my ass on the spinning bike and limiting my cheese addiction, but now I’m a fucking hero staying at home and watching my shorts get increasingly tighter as …
I’m a fly by the seat of my pantalone’s kind of a betty so I was fucking stoked when my trip to Hilton coincided with the breaking news story that the first confirmed case of Covid-19 was in my “home” town. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not wishing the virus on anyone (enemies excluded), …
There’s a popular dating metaphor about unicorns. Everyone is in search of these elusive unicorns- the “perfect man” or the “perfect woman” (if we’re working in gender binaries). By my measure, my limited insight into Tinder, everyone thinks they’re a fucking unicorn. The age of digital media and popular folklore has led us to believe …